Guest blogger - Colin Barnes

Colin F. Barnes is a writer from the UK who writes Science Fiction, Horror and Thriller fiction. He likes to take the gritty edginess from his surroundings and personal experiences and translate them into his stories. He is currently working on an anthology of horror stories in his 'City of Hell Chronicles' setting after recently debuting with a crime anthology titled 'Killing my Boss'.

Essence of Extremity

Dark fiction is a wide umbrella covering a gamut of flavours of sub genres. I tend to write and read what I call Horror. It's at the extreme end of Horror. Somehow, over the course of the last decade, 'Horror' has been devalued to cover paranormal romance and angsty YA urban fantasy. One only needs to look at the Amazon charts under Horror to see this diabolical hijacking of the label. What his means is that readers are slowly but surely loosing the true essence of extremity within the horror bounds.

I'm talking about Ketchum, Barker, early King, Laymon et al. I'm talking about I Spit On Your Grave, Texas Chainsaw Massacre (original), Hellraiser etc.. You know, when Horror meant horrific experiences. When horror had scares that actually scared you.

I remember watching the original Friday the 13th as a kid and having nightmares for weeks after; that was pure horror (of its time). Not this weak romantic rubbish. I mean, come on, what the hell is 'horror' about a woman having a romantic triangle with an effeminate vampire and a pruning wolf? It makes me sick to see Horror be reduced to this.

One of the first dark fiction books I read as a youngster was King’s IT – so yeah, I now fucking hate clowns too. King has single handedly ruined children’s parties (for the adults). Excellent work Steve!

We need more of this subversive fiction. We need to twist common tropes into things that scare the living crap out of people. Without fear, humanity gets lazy. Life becomes predictable, stale, and safe. Who wants that? Not me. I want excitement. I want to double check that thing I thought I saw in the shadows, I want to feel the frisson of energy as I hear footsteps late at night in the attic. What I don’t want is this bland formula of ‘horror.’ And neither should you.

So, what can we, as creatives, do about it? Promote, write, share, push, and abuse networks. Get our work out there; force people to dwell in the shadows again, scare the crap out of them. It means we as authors and creators need to dig that little bit deeper; find what scares the jaded/cynical people of today and hold a mirror up to their fears and go beyond what it is considered acceptable. It's only when doing that can we actually reclaim the title of Horror.

This is where the essence of extremity comes in. I’m not advocating stories to be extreme for extreme’s sake. That’s too lazy, and it’ll show. Hell, it already shows in things such as SAW. Torture porn with no real intent behind it. We need to take the extreme areas of life and our imagination and tie them into everyday reason. That is how we can reconnect ‘Horror’ with the masses.

Most people are disgusted or even bored at extreme gore, so we need to be cleverer about it. We need to be more subtle, and insidious with out extreme stories.

Once you’ve roped in a reader and given them a false sense of security with a solid grounding of reality and rationale, then you bring your out the big guns. You give them terrifying situations with things that can barely be described with regular words. You show them something so horrendous that it’s impossible to fit it wholesale into your stories. You want to leave some of ‘it’ hanging outside of the story so that it sits inside your readers mind, clawing its way out for weeks on end.

If you’re going to have gore or extreme sex (which are both good things in proper Horror) you have to do it so it counts. Everyday people can see the most horrendous things as easily as searching on Google. They are desensitized to the images and videos and concepts. We need to make it personal. And there is only one way to do that -- no, not abduct them and taken them into your basement dungeon – but good, deep characterization.

Weak protagonists are just that. No one cares about some insipid teenager, or some moaning kid. You want fully realized three-dimensional characters that are made up of shades of grey. No one likes wholly good or wholly bad characters; they have to be a mix. They have to be like you and I (perhaps not like me, readers really wouldn’t be able to relate to me). They have to be the everyman/everywoman.

Take that character, get inside their head, and then bring on the horror. That is the essence of extremity – personal experiences shared by the author with the reader. Connect! When you think you’ve gone as far as you can, slug a shot of whiskey, pull your pants up and go beyond. You know you can do it. We have to do it for Horror’s sake.

##

A brilliantly argued guest post, I'm sure you'll agree!

You can find Colin online at Twitter, his personal website and Amazon.

www.cityofhellchronicles.com 

Kate x

Guest blogger - Charles W Jones

This week's guest post comes from Charles W Jones (@ChuckWesJ). Charles is the author of The Second Plain and An Unnamed Acquaintance.  The Second Plain is his first published work.  It is about a man, Saul, who can control dreams; both his and that of other people.  During the story, Saul has to discover that he is actually in charge and not the Man who is wreaking havoc on people’s dreams, turning them into nightmares.  


This book took Charles around six years to write; not because of writers block, but because life jumped in the way.  His second book, An Unnamed Acquaintance, is a collection of strange short stories and poetry.  After reading Jake’s Pitchfork Diaries, Charles decided that it was time to put his short stories and poetry together.  Charles wrote these stories and poems several years ago and updated them from their original borderline vanilla state.  Learn more about Charles at his blog, bizzarofiction.blogspot.com or by following him on Twitter @ChuckWesJ.

I’ve been writing odd little stories since I was a kid.  Most are lost and forgotten somewhere in the dust motes of the past.  I draw, too, and attempt to dabble with Photoshop, but that program is a little bit much for me.  I grew up in a small town called Shoshoni, WY and I managed to break free from its grasp with my dark soul intact.  Growing up in a small town scared me to death most of the time.  It’s very dark at night - I mean really dark.  I think Shoshoni had like ten streetlights.  To top it off, it is full of ghosts; well, that’s what I thought when I was kid. Turns out it was just the constant wind blowing dirt around.

I was the only one that knew about The Second Plain during the writing process.  I guess the reason is because…I have no idea; maybe I just didn’t want anyone to know until I was finished.  (I’m trying to be more forthcoming about my current work in progress, Circus Tarot.)  During the process of writing The Second Plain, my partner’s father’s cancer returned with a vengeance and I couldn’t concentrate on much of anything.  Then earlier this year I decided it was time to finish.  That actually was very easy; everything was still fresh in my mind.  The problem came with the editing, I used a source that was recommended to me on the internet (I will not mention any names), and published it on Smashwords.  Then a friend of mine starts telling me that words are missing.  FUCK, are you kidding me?  Probably the most embarrassing moment in my life. 

I told my partner about writing The Second Plain as I was posting the information on Facebook.  Yes, I admit I have communication issues and I’m a bit reclusive (until you get to know me) but that’s part of my charm.  Everyone else is as shocked that I wrote a book as he was.  When they ask what it’s about, I’m vague at first, forcing them to ask more questions.  When I say, “It’s a horror novel” why do people feel compelled to ask, “Is it scary?”  Didn’t I just say it’s a horror novel?  Then I explain a little bit more.  

People look at me strangely too, when I say “horror”; one even said “you look so normal.”  I write fiction, lady, I don’t write about things I do on my free time, as fun as that would be sometimes.  The thing that worries me the most about The Second Plain is that people won’t be able to get past the fact that Saul, the main character, is gay; even though that has maybe 5% influence on the story.  The Second Plain is not gay erotica; those books are really creepy though.  It is not packed full of man-on-man action; I have to admit there are two scenes but one is vague, and in the other the man catches on fire. 

There isn’t a part of the horror genre I don’t like.  I like it creepy, filled with suspense or brutal with descriptive torture scenes.  My favorite horror movies have always been the slasher movies; give me the gore.  Lately, there hasn’t been anything that has made me even giggle once.  I find most horror movies funny; aren’t they supposed to be?  I actually wrote The Second Plain because I was bored with what was out there in the horror genre at my local independent bookstore (literally a bookshelf 8” wide with four shelves and not even full).  I decided that if Clive or Stephen can do it, then I could too.

I’m currently working on Circus Tarot.  It’s a fun little tale about a husband and wife with a weird Donna Reed feel.  The wife works part-time at a consignment shop and the husband is a junior partner at some office.  Wifey buys some tarot cards from an old woman at the shop and ends up in the dark world of Circus Tarot.  There are some excerpts on my blog.

Thanks Jake, Kate and everyone else at Family of Dog for the opportunity to guest blog. 

The Second Plain is as available in eBook format at Amazon, Barnes and Noble, Smashwords and other eBook retailers; it is also available in paperback at Amazon and Createspace.  An Unnamed Acquaintance is available at Smashwords and other eBook retailers coming soon. 

Kate x

Killer Aphrodite

Hey guys and girls,

Exciting news to share today - Jake is going to be writing a weekly column over at the supremely awesome Killer Aphrodite! To celebrate, they're running a giveaway for the Pitchfork Diaries, so swing by, say hi and show them some dirty love in the way that we know only you can...

Kate x

Guest blogger - Darkside Films

So, today I'm delighted to be able to share with you all an interview with DW Kann @ Darkside Films. As you know, here at the Family of Dog and the Goat Franchise we're avid supporters of all things horror, and I jumped at the chance to have a chat with DW about their new project, 'Sever'. They might be filmmakers, but there's a lot here for film buffs and authors alike - if you like horror, then you'll love reading what they have to say.

Pull up a seat and have a read. Let us know what you think, let them know what you think, share the link around and don't forget to swing by www.severthemovie.com when you're done. Kate x

1. So, tell us where this all began! Was it a midnight flash of

inspiration, or has this project been something you’ve dreamed of

doing for a long time?

SEVER is a project that has had a long journey before it was ever committed to paper.  I kept a log from as far back as the early 1990's of circumstances that I had experienced or stories I heard.  Then several years ago I began researching heavily into serial killers, part of this was from a particular experience I had encountered back in college.  A friend and I used to "hedge" or go "urban spelunking" in abandoned buildings. We had seen a lot of strange things and had even ventured at night in these places.  One night we were about to go in and I decided not to go, something in my gut told me it was a bad idea.  After some back and forth arguing with my friend who called me a "pussy" we decided to go and get a pint instead.  The next morning on the local news I saw the building we were at the night before and they were removing a body of a serial killer who had slit his own throat.  He had been linked to a couple of be-headings in the area, the news dubbed him the Vampire-Nazi.  Needless to say it was a year before we stepped foot back in that place.  They say write what you know, I believe life experience is the best way to lend itself in screenplay form.   

2. What makes ‘Sever’ different from all the other horror films out there?

SEVER I wanted to take a step further and create an online world prior to the film.  Not just a trailer, but a character, someone who hides in plane site in every day life.  I wanted this film to be interactive, whether you read or listen to the information about Patrick online before or after you've seen the film.  You can discover all this back story on your own, in researching about him.  This would give you far more depth to a character than just tuning in for an hour and a half.  He's more complicated than that.  I've never seen a film approached this way and this was something I've been wanting to do long before social media took over the internet.  We connect with movie stars this way, with friends, with prisoners even dating.  Why not create an iconic horror character this way and who we can follow.

3. Where do you draw your inspiration from?

Really from everything.  I know that may sound trite.  But I spend a lot of time outdoors and being very active.  I also enjoy researching immensely as well as my photography and artwork.  These all gestate in my mind swirling around and then something clicks.  It may be an image that spawns a story or a line that someone told me.  I'm also a huge observer of people which also lends itself to wonderful stories to tell as you can imagine.

4. Has there ever been a moment when you’ve doubted whether this

project would succeed? And if so, how did you beat the doubts?

I've been battling to get this film made for almost six years through various means.  I've never believed in a project as much as this.  If it fails it's because I gave up and that won't happen.  I've given the screenplay to at least twenty people or more who've read it to get their response which has been amazing.  They see it's potential and that's what really keeps me going, their enthusiasm to want to see a finished product.  Their thoughts on how the story ends and who Patrick is and what he means are all different, that is something very special me and the fact that I was able to capture it in this way always puts a smile on my face.

5. More and more authors are making the jump into self-publishing, but are often met with disdain. Have you encountered this at all as a

result of your unconventional approach to funding your film project?

It's a constant battle to get your project made, whether it be a book, film or album.  Especially now with the advent of consumer grade cameras.  Everyone thinks they're a filmmaker who owns a computer and a camera and that's just not true.  Not everyone can accomplish this, but society dictates otherwise.  And with the market flooded with so much mediocrity you have to really stand out.  I believe if your work truly has longevity, someone will find you and take that chance.

6. How can our readers support you – and why should they?

I only have a few days left on my kickstarter page.  I will be re-launching it again via a different crowd funding site in a month or so.  I am currently putting together another promo trailer which I will also launch at the time.  If your readers like what they see either there or on the films website www.severthemovie.com they can support us by contributing, even if it's just a $1.  As I mentioned above, the people that have read the script and the comments of new fans who have been reading Patrick's blog on the site and listening to his interview want more, they like what they're discovering.  I think your readers will too.

7. Fan-backed projects have really taken off of late, both in music

and in film. Do you think that the industry needs to seriously

consider your approach as the way forward?

Yes, I think this is truly the wave of the future.  It may take some time to stick, but Hollywood has already been searching through talent on YouTube for instance, so why not crowd funding.  The great thing is that fans, true fans can put their money to something they believe in and watch it come alive and be apart of it.  

8. You’re going to be filming in Martha’s Vineyard at the end of this

year. Is that where you always imagined you would film when the

project was conceived?

Yes, the other part of my story of how SEVER came to be was told to me by my father over 20 years ago about a man arriving here on the island via a small boat.  He lived in a winter house that had been closed for the season by the ocean.  Sneaking around the island, making money, doing what he needed too to survive and then one day he vanished.  I know this because I saw what he left behind.  This place has a lot to offer and delivers the isolation I am looking for.  Especially in the winter months.

9. Who do you think ‘Sever’ is going to appeal to?

Oh man, that's a good question.  I would hope it would transcend beyond the horror fans.  There are some gruesome moments, but it's really a psychological thriller.  Growing up watching Polanski, Lynch, Cronenberg to name a few as a kid really stuck with me.  One of the biggest compliments I receive from everyone that has read the screenplay is that they have a love hate relationship with Patrick.  I enjoy that very much because it is those characters you never forget in films.  

10. In media, some people see what they do as a job, and others do it

simply because they have an overwhelming love for it. Which side of

the fence do you come down upon – is Darkside Films a profession or a passion?

It depends on the project I'm working on.  I am hired out from time to time to get films back on track whether it be by re-editing projects or producing them to completion where someone else wasn't able to finish the task.  My personal projects like SEVER are passionate endeavors though if there was a job in it, it's raising the financing which I cannot stand.  It pains me greatly to have to peddle my work prior to getting it made, ask anyone who knows me.  I would much rather be the craftsman than the executive producer.

11. What does the future hold for Darkside Films?

We have several projects that we're developing that range from commercial films to animated features to boutique projects.  We're looking for the right person who is fiscally responsible and has a financial background to help us get even further out there.  We've never been more ready to explode on the scene with the material we have. 

12. And finally, tell us what it is about horror that inspires you.

Why have you gravitated towards this genre in particular?

I don't know honestly.  In high school we made Monty Python style puking videos in the 80's.  Then I got into make-up FX and went to the Art Institute of Pittsburgh because it was where Zombies came from.  

I like being scared and I've been truly scared several times in my life, it's an adrenaline rush that I crave.  But on the same token, what I see in every day life disturbs me and with a sick fascination I want to know more.  Why do people do what they do?  Why do men kill each other?  What is there reasoning behind this?  This is what truly frightens me, because most of the time they don't have an answer for you.  They just do it.

Huge thanks to DW for taking the time to answer my questions - he's certainly piqued my interest, and I can't wait to see what 'Sever' evolves into!

More reviews streaming in for the Pitchfork Diaries...

Scott Shoyer on Anything Horror recently reviewed the Pitchfork Diaries.

Thanks, Scott, for the fantastic review - go and have a read of what he said, and if you've read the Diaries we'd love to hear your thoughts.

http://anythinghorror.com/2011/09/15/the-pitchfork-diaries-volume-one-2011/

Kate x

The Family welcomes its first guest blogger...

I'm delighted to introduce the first in a series of guest bloggers that will be gracing the pages of the Family of Dog blog over the coming months - Mike Kozlowski. If you're interested in having your work featured here, then email me; be warned, though, it takes something special to meet with our approval. Saying that, of course, neither Jake or I are averse to a bit of good, old-fashioned bribery or flattery... Kate x

Michael A. Kozlowski is the author of Some Days Suck, Some Days Suck worse, a collection of horror and suspense stories. He has been published in various magazines, has a novella in print titled Above the Clouds, and has authored a travel memoir about moving to, living and working in Australia.

He lives in a reasonably quiet suburb of an unreasonably loud city in Michigan, USA, with his wife and two boys. They keep him around for entertainment purposes only. He is banned form telling the children bedtime stories.

You can find out more about his writing, works in progress and general activity at his website, www.mikekozlowski.com, on his blog, www.blog.mikekozlowski.com, or by following him on Twitter.

"Hank, I’m a horror writer.

That’s the answer I like to give when people ask me what I do. I enjoy the way their faces take on that dull, glazed over expression while they try to sort out if that means I’m only moments away from pulling out a machete and lopping off one of their arms. You know, just for fun.

Sometimes I build up to it a little by just saying I’m a writer and letting them get around to the specifics. Rarely, these days, do I start off with telling them what my day job is (the one that actually pays most of the bills). I’m not ashamed of my day job, it’s a good one that pays pretty well, but I have come to define myself as a writer; a struggling author, perhaps, that happens to have to take on other work to make ends meet for the time being (like all those actors in Hollywood that are serving dinners and wine to the people they wish they were).

After the initial shock wears off, people tend to say something along the lines of, “Oh! Like Stephen King?” Well, yes and no. I write stories that might make you think of King or Peter Straub or Richard Matheson or a hundred other “horror” writers but I don’t write Stephen King stories (he does that well enough on his own). Frankly, King’s stories don’t often scare me, or even disturb me. Nor do any other horror stories. That doesn’t mean I don’t enjoy them, I’m just a hard scare. I try to write about the things that give me the chills or that, at least, make me pause. If I can do that then I’m reasonably certain that they will give little, creepy feelings to my readers.

Now most of the things that scare me are pretty mundane and wouldn’t necessarily be horror story fodder. Things like impotency, family tragedy, random drug testing and flaming midgets (it’s a well documented fact that I love both midgets, with whom everything is more fun or funnier, and flames, with which everything is cooler, but that they terrify me in combination). My stories, by and large, tend to focus on the dark parts of the human condition. Sure, I write the occasionally monster yarn but there is usually, at the heart of it, some mental issue going on. I like when you read a horror story and say, “You know, that could happen” because that makes shit really scary.

I also tend to stay away from happy endings. In fact, I have a whole collection of stories that end badly. Well, I guess that depends on the perspective, but you know what I mean. It’s not that I’m a dark, angst ridden person. In fact, I am quite the opposite. I nearly always look on the bright side of things, am generally upbeat and tend to be pretty humorous, if reports from friends and family can be trusted (and they probably can’t be, ‘cause those fuckers lie a lot). I also tend to write a lot of parenthetical statements because I have a hard time staying focused and that practice lets me spout off about whatever I want to, whenever I want to (but that has nothing to do with this post other than to amuse me).

Most stories, horror or otherwise, tend to have a happy ending or, at a minimum, a satisfying resolution that lets the reader close the book and go to sleep knowing that the day has been saved, humanity has prevailed, the monsters have been vanquished, the boy got the girl, the bad guy was served a healthy dose of justice, etc., etc. Not all of them, to be sure, but most of them. You can usually find a hero. I can’t tell you exactly why my stories don’t typically end up that way but they don’t. In fact, I’ve been told by a few trusted readers that I seem incapable of a happy ending, though they mysteriously keep expecting one (I’ve also been told that there is something very, very wrong with me, that I’m probably insane and that they’d rather not have me around their kids anymore).

Maybe my stories end in gruesome and horrifying ways because the effort of keeping a sunny disposition all the rest of the time pushes all those dark bits down and they need a way to get out;  a way that doesn’t involve high powered rifles and clock towers. Maybe I just like being a bit different (“different” is one of those words people like to use when describing me anyway as in, “He’s a really great guy though he is a bit…different.” That pause speaks volumes). It could be that it’s just so much damn fun writing bad guys and evil things that I get attached to them and end up rooting for them to win (Note: I realize this is going on a blog that originates in England and, as a person that has spent some time in Australia (yes, I know that’s not in England) I feel it may be necessary to point out that “rooting” in this sense does not mean “fucking.” It means pulling for or putting one’s support behind (and I suppose that last one could mean “fucking” too. God, you’re a bunch of sick bastards)).

How’d you like that? Parenthesis inside of parenthesis…twice! Fuck yeah! I’m on a role! And a tangent, I notice. Should this bit be in parenthesis, as well? Shit, I’m confusing myself. Oh well, onwards and upwards.

After people realize that I’m not likely to kill them on the sidelines of my son’s football game (that’s American football, folks, not soccer), they usually go in one of two directions; neither of them, in this case, being running away from me. They will either comment that they are going to go find some of my work to read it (which, I’ve discovered, is usually true about 1/10^th of a percent of the time) or they say that they just don’t have the stomach for horror.

I always find that last statement so confusing. Fear is such a primal instinct. One we have used for survival and safety since the dawn of man. It paid off not to go poking the sleeping Saber tooth Tiger. But fear can also be so damn much fun. It gets the heart racing and the blood pumping. It gets you all sweaty and worked up. And when it’s over there is a nice, exhausted, relieved feeling and a sense of accomplishment. Now that I think about it, Fear is a whole lot like Sex (but not as messy and, if you’re doing the latter correctly, probably not as fun).

I can only assume these people haven’t read a scary book or watched a horror movie since they were six. I can only surmise that they never watch the news, because that’s a whole lot scarier than anything I can come up with. I guess they spend their time reading Newsweek or romance novels and the closest they’ve been to horror involves sparkly vampires (don’t get me started). Most likely, they don’t read much of anything at all and spend their free time watching The Biggest Loser (while sitting on the couch eating fatty snacks) or American Idol or something.

I feel sad for them. I can’t imagine not having read Carrie or ‘Salem’s Lot, I Am Legend, Horns or 20^th Century Ghosts, Dracula, The Haunting of Hill House, Ghost Story, Something Wicked This Way Comes and countless others. How do you get through life not having seen the Friday the 13^th series or Halloween, The Thing, Dawn of the Dead, Amityville Horror, The Exorcist and on and on?

I’m not saying horror is the end all be all, I like other genres just as well, but it should be included in any well-rounded individual’s library or DVD collection. It’s a bit like depriving yourself of new foods and living on a diet of bread and water. Sure, you might survive, but what a waste (unless you’re talking about mushrooms; nobody should ever, for any reason, eat a fucking mushroom).

So what does all this mean? What is the point I’m trying to make here?

Fuck if I know. I’m just ranting. Kate was kind enough to let me play in her sandbox and I’m gonna make a good, God damned mess of it because I can. Maybe you get a glimpse into the mind of a horror writer. Maybe you decide to go read a “scary” book or watch a horror movie even though you haven’t in a long while. Maybe you get a giggle or two or you start adding random parenthetical statements to your emails and letter correspondences. I don’t care. I was able to vent and it was fun. Just be glad I didn’t really go off and start on about those sparkly vampires or what I ate for breakfast and how it affected my bowel movements or what color underwear I’m wearing today (or IF I’m wearing underwear today). Don’t push me. I’ll fuckin’ do it! Be glad I held it together for this long. I am a bit…different, after all."

Mike's anthology is available through Amazon, Barnes & Noble & Smashwords. If you want a collection of tales that will in turn chill your bones, curl your toes and make you laugh out loud, then this is the one for you. I gave it 5* on Goodreads - and trust me, I'm notoriously hard to please!

Pitchfork Diaries Volume One out now!

So, did you hear the news?

Halloween's come early this year.

That's right - and it means that we've bowed to your increasingly frantic demands and worked our lovely asses into the ground to get the Pitchfork Diaries ready for release...now!

No, your eyes are not deceiving you! The first volume of the Diaries is now available for your delectation through Smashwords; and what's more, buy it this weekend and you can use coupon code DN54K to get it for just $1.99!

What are you waiting for?! Go and buy, and then let us know what you think - we're hungry for reviews, good or bad.

Can you handle the Diaries? http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/85736

Kate x

PS. Don't turn off the light when you go to sleep tonight...

An introduction!

Hey guys,

So, as  Jake mentioned in the previous post, there have been a few changes here at the Family of Dog HQ of late. We're all sorry to see Stacy go, but Alys and Saran are superb additions to the family and I know we're all going to have a hell of a lot of fun together!

And on that note, I'm really excited to announce that over the coming month, we're going to be welcoming guest contributors to the blog. Are you someone who is involved in the world of horror? Are you an author, an artist, a publisher, or do you maybe run a website about all things horror? If so, we'd love to hear from you.

If you'd be interested in guesting on the blog, then please email me with what it is that you do and your Twitter name and website (if applicable). Let me know what you'd like to talk about - as you can probably guess, here at the Family of Dog we go further than anyone else. Nothing is too gruesome, nothing is too extreme - I love to be scared, so give it your best shot!

Feel free to email me or Jake at any time or catch up with us on Twitter or at my blog sites - we'd love to hear from you, and don't forget to keep your eyes peeled here for all the amazing guests we've got coming up.

And most importantly - the release of the Pitchfork Diaries is just two months away! Tell everyone you know, and prepare yourself for the ride of your life...

Kate x

J.S. Reached 1,000 Followers today on Twitter!

YAY! That's right!

The ever-so-sexy and talented J.S. Bannerman (a.k.a. Jake Bannerman) reached 1,000 Followers on Twitter today so we're celebrating by giving away 1 free, digital copy of Licking the Nails of the Crucifix by J.S. Bannerman to the first two people to leave a comment on this post.

Come on you Lurkers and The FOD CRÜE Members...just a quick "Hello There" is all we need...trust me, it's worth the extra few seconds that it will take to leave a comment. ;-)

Official Pages & Sites for J.S. Bannerman

Hiya,

We've been having some trouble with crazy-people opening fake accounts on various sites (must mean that J.S. is getting REALLY popular lol) so we've decided to announce all Official Sites where you can follow your favorite author.

Find J.S. Bannerman on:

Facebook Profile: http://www.facebook.com/J.S.Bannerman
Facebook Fan Page: https://www.facebook.com/pages/JS-Bannerman-Family-of-Dog-Offical-Fan-Page/210453205640488
Twitter: @JakeBannerman

You can email J.S. at: jake@familyofdog.com

Unblessing the Purity

This chapter plays a very important part in my book series The Family of Dog and is found in the first book The Harvest due this fall/winter.
It is also one of the most controversial things ever written and I stand by the shock the horror and anger it causes !
It is supposed to create hate and anger that is the purpose because Jesus is angry and full of hate in the scene.
For a limited time I am going to post my original manuscript which was called "How does your garden Grow?"
Therefore it is
1.Unedited
2.Fragmented
3.Not what will be in the book as it has been edited and rewritten,However what it turned out to be after its completion is stunning~

Here it is!


CHAPTER 17:

HOW DOES YOUR GARDEN GROW?THE PLUSH TREES AND GRASS COVERED IN DEW SURROUNDED BY ORCHARDS AND ORCHARDS OF ANY FRUIT YOU HAD EVER DREAMED OF THE WATER WAS CLEAR AS FRESH FALLEN SNOW THAT HAD BEEN MELTED JUST TO SEDUCE YOUR QUENCHING A RAINBOW CROSSED THE EASTERN SKY AS THE AIR WAS CRISP “ I NEED YOU TO GO TO THE GARDEN OF INIQUITY AND FIND THE HARRIOT OF REILNALT” ADAM HAD NEVER BEEN APART FROM HIS PARTNER AND THE LAND WAS SO VAST HE DID NOT WANT TO DISAPPOINT JESUS HE WANTED TO SHOW HIS GRATITUDE AND SEVERANCE THAT GOD HAD CREATED HIM FOR TO SERVE THE ALMIGHTY HIS WILL WAS ADAMS COMMAND AS HE WALKED INTO THE fields IN FRONT OF HIM BAREFOOT AND NUDE THOUGH AS WE ALL KNOW WAS NOT AN ISSUE IN THE GARDEN JESUS WAS NOT SUPPOSED TO BE HERE ON STRICT ORDERS FROM GOD HIMSELF JESUS HAD SHARED HIS EMOTIONS ABOUT EVE WITH GOD AND LUCIFER HE FELT LUST TOWARDS HER AND GOD FORBADE THIS JESUS HAD BEEN THINKING OF A WAY TO SEPARATE ADAM FROM EVE JUST TO HAVE MOMENT WITH HER EVEN THOUGH HER KNEW GOD WOULD NOT BE HAPPY IS HE FOUND OUT BUT THE SCENT OF EVE HAUNTED HIS EVERYTHING HE COULD NOT REMOVE THESE FEELINGS FROM HIS INNARDS HE EVEN TOLD GOD HE WOULD FORGIVE HIS POOR DECISION TO MAKE THE HUMANS IF GOD WOULD CREATE A WOMAN FOR HIM JESUS HAD NEVER SEEN ANYTHING SO BEAUTIFUL AND WOULD NEVER OF HAD AN ISSUE IF GOD HAD ONLY CREATED THE MALE SERVANTS BUT GOD WANTED 2 ONE FEMALE HE CALLED IT AND IT WAS WITH THE HELP OF LUCIFER HONORED AS THE MOST BEAUTIFUL ANGEL THAT GOD CREATED THIS BODY OF SOFT FLESH AND CURVES THAT HAD SUCH A SCENT THE MOISTNESS FROM BETWEEN EVES LEGS PENETRATED JESUS NOSTRILS AND HIS MIND WENT INTO A TERRITORY FORBIDDEN JESUS SPOKE TO EVE HAVE YOU EVER HAD THE FRUIT OF knowledge? YOUR FATHER SAID WE ARE NOT TO TOUCH IT JESUS SAID HE ALSO TOLD ME I AM NO LONGER TO BE IN THE GARDEN OR SPEAK TO YOU.EVE DID NOT UNDERSTAND JESUS WAS A WONDERFUL MAN WHO LOOKED OUT FOR EVERYONE BEFORE HIMSELF AND WHY HE WAS NOT ALLOWED TO SPEAK TO HER ANY LONGER DID NOT EQUATE FOR HER, JESUS SAID TO HER HE DOES NOT WANT YOU TO KNOW THE PLEASURE OF THE FRUIT.SHE ASKED PLEASURE?JESUS WALKED SLOWLY TOWARDS EVE AND PUT HIS HANDS IN HER HAIR AND SPOKE SOFTLY I WILL SHOW YOU EVE AND WITH THE QUICKNESS OF A SNAKE THRASHING ITS PREY JESUS THREW EVE TO THE GROUND FORCING HIS TONGUE IN HER MOUTH AS HIS HANDS SQUEEZED HER BREAST SHE MOANED IN SURPRISE AND SHE HAD NEVER SEEN THIS BEFORE AS JESUS HANDS CARESSED HER BODY HE SPOKE THE FRUIT BRINGS THIS PLEASURE AS HER GREEN EYES GAZED UP AT HIM HE THRUST HIS COCK INTO HER FRESH VIRGIN CUNT AS SHE SCREAMED IN PAIN HE MOANED IN LUSTFUL SIN THE PLEASURE OF THE FLESH WAS SO SWEET AS HE CONTINUED TO SLAM HIS PELVIC BONE IN AND OUT OF EVE SHE WAS CONFUSED BUT WAS IN INCREASINGLY OVERWHELMING PLEASURE HIS COCK FELT AMAZING GLIDING INSIDE OF HER HER JUICES FLOWING WITH A SLIGHT MIXTURE OF BLOOD FROM HER RUPTURED HYMAN SHE PUSHED BACK AS HE CONTINUED TO THRUST INTO HER VIOLENTLY HER HIPS BEING SLAMMED WITH LUST-FILLED VIGOR HER VAGINAL WALLS RIPPING FROM THE SIZE OF HIS MANHOOD SHE FELT SO WRONG AND SO RIGHT HIS BODY SLAPPING AGAINST HER BREAST NOW AFLAME WITH NEW SENSATIONS THEIR BODIES WRITING LIKE WATER AND STONE ON THE SHORES OF THE OCEANS THIS PLEASURE HAD TO BE SHARED AS JESUS REMOVED HIMSELF FROM HER INSIDES HE EJACULATED ON EVES FACE SAYING TASTE OF ME CHILD.THOUGH SHE WAS IN EROTIC SHOCK AND HAD DISCOVERED A LESSON IN LUST FROM JESUS SHE COULD NOT SAY TO HIM IT WAS AGAINST HER WILL HE USED HIS STRENGTH AS A MAN AND ALONG WITH THE PULSATING WALLS OF HER CUNT HER INSIDES ALSO PUMPED WITH A FEELING OF ADVANTAGE..... JESUS WALKED AWAY FROM THE JUICE AND SEMEN COVERED EVE AND SAID ITS CALLED RAPE I OWN YOU WHORE, EAT THE FRUIT WITH ADAM AND BLAME IT ALL ON LUCIFER OR I WILL BE BACK TO DO IT AGAIN YOU ARE FILTH AND I USED YOU FOR MY GAIN FILTHY GAIN AND YOU LIKED IT.

Join the Family of Dog Crüe!

Hey Crüe!
How many of you are signed up for email updates? Did you know if you follow the blog and sign up for email updates that it makes you part of The Family of Dog Crüe?
That means that you'll get all the news first and receive special Crüe discounts and offers.
You never know what to expect or when, between that sexy-ass Stacy and Jake; as part of the Crüe you can even get some random free stuff!
Sign up and join The Family of Dog Crüe today.
Blessed are the sick,
J.S.B

Latest Press Release!!

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE - Connecticut, USA - July 14, 2011

Contact for all Media, Literary & Press Inquiries:

Ms. Stacy Diablo

Family of Dog & The Goat Franchise™ Publicist/Press Agent

E-mail: stacydiablo@familyofdog.com

"Asking Questions And Getting Answers --- The Hard Way!”, The Goat Franchise™ Announces the upcoming release of Book 1, Family of Dog: The Harvest by J.S. Bannerman in the Fall/Winter of 2011!

About “Family of Dog: The Harvest”

Whatever happened to Lucifer and why was he the bad guy? One of the most troubling plagues that mankind has suffered from throughout history is complacency. It is more damaging than polio, more putrid than the Bubonic Plague and more rampant than influenza; and it is getting worse. Our children are indoctrinated into the church of 'don't ask and don’t tell' from the age of two but unlike polio, this plague, this viral complacency is very quickly and easily cured. QUESTIONS! Questions are important; this Orwellian 'ignorance is knowledge' crusade must end. Instead of relying on a television to inform us, we need to get our minds a little dirty and discover what we REALLY need, not what we are told that we need. Some will argue that the times have changed and we have progressed alongside of the technological advancements, but they couldn’t be more wrong. Step aside you pushovers and naysayers; there’s a new Dog in town!

About the Author, J.S. Bannerman

Born and raised in the North-Eastern United States, J.S. Bannerman currently resides in the country, outside of Connecticut with his German Shepard, Victor. The author makes frequent, gas-guzzling trips to Oklahoma City where he is adding the finishing touches to the “Family of Dog: The Harvest” manuscript. Rumoured to have a Canadian mistress, J.S. Bannerman is an avid collector of Nazi memorabilia, porn and naked, female-fan photos; when he’s not driving, writing or taking his dog for a walk, he’s usually sleeping. The author plans to write each book in the FOD series, in a different American City or Town; with the throw of a dart, he just might be sitting and writing in a bar near you. For the most up-to-date information on the “Family of Dog” Series, the Short Stories and all things J.S. Bannerman, please visit the “Family of Dog” blog at: http://familyofdog.blogspot.com/.

About The Goat Franchise™

The Goat Franchise™ is made up of a small group of intelligent, free-thinking individuals who ask a lot of questions and don’t take no for an answer. The Goat Franchise™ stands for freedom of thought and it promotes and supports all creative works by J.S. Bannerman.

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The Pitchfork Diaries

Ok so I hate this part because if you know me at all you know I do NOT like the business end of this. That being said however, I want to deliver the best of everything to YOU and that's why we sell stories, gear, etc. so I can put everything back into the books!
All of the short stories we are selling well and they will be released in volumes called The Pitchfork Diaries later on this year. Each story is limited to 666 copies outside of the volumes and they will eventually sell-out; the only way you can have them before Pitchfork comes out is to grab them now.
I hope you do not think I am lame because I really really want all of this for YOU!
So that one dollar story goes right back into your pocket!
We are going to make history because you know the mass public is against us, right?
Let's do this together and thanks for standing by me you are THE CRÜE!
Blessed are the sick,
J.S.B

5 inch needles !!!!

So for those of you who do not know, your favorite horror writer suffers from mega migraine headaches. I visited the hospital yesterday and received a new drug for headaches; they injected it into my shoulder joints with big big long needles!
I feel great today and I am going to start work on my newest short story tonight. It is called "Under the last Domino". Imagine your last breath in the hands of not only your sworn enemy, but an entire race of your enemies!
Thanks so much for all of your support don't forget to pick a short story or two; we have them for sale for just $1 each!
Blessed are the sick,
J.S.B

He's done it again...

That's right! Our favorite author and the other love of my life (don't ask) has written another creep-the-shit-out-of-you short story --- To Walk the Path of Maggots.

Every Monday you'll have the opportunity to get your new, Limited Edition short story, straight from the mind of J.S. Bannerman.

Ohhh, as an afterthought, I suppose that I should officially introduce myself. Hi there, my name is Stacy Diablo (jesus, I feel like I'm in Kindergarten again...) and I am the go-to gal/publicist for the super-sexy and ever-so-talented J.S. Bannerman. You may have noticed some changes around here recently and it's all thanks to me...well most of it. lol :-)

Keep your eyes peeled for a new short story every week and a few sneak-peek teasers from Family of Dog: The Harvest by J.S. Bannerman.

Stay Sexy,
Stacy D.

Scarecrow and news

Hey Crüe,
Sales of my short story The Scarecrow's Lament are going well!
Thank you if you have already picked your copy up and if not, what are you waiting for?!
It looks like we are going to be releasing a new short story once a week on Monday's. Each will be for-sale in the same formats as Scarecrow; signed/unsigned/personalized/script paper signed, etc. Also, as we build a library of stories we will be releasing package deals and special editions! All building up of course to the first volume of The Pitchfork Diaries!
Don't take your eye off of the release of the first book in The Family of Dog series; Family of Dog: The Harvest, which will be coming out the Fall/Winter of 2011.
Trust me when I say that the short stories are just the tip of the iceberg; this book series will blow your head completely off!
Tell everyone just $1 gets you amazing and new, beyond the boundaries horror each week!
You all kick mega butt!

Super elastic devil plastic,
J.S.B

Thanks to Snakebite Horror!!!

Thanks Snakebite Horror! Check this out.

Interview with FEARdex.com horror ezine!

•What was your inspiration behind Family of Dog?

First and foremost thank you very much for the interview it is appreciated and I hope it brings readers insight on the book and series.

I honestly cannot say there was an inspiration as much as years of built up frustration that finally exploded and needed to be put on paper. My father, who the book is dedicated to, taught me to question everything even, if you have been told the answer. We all know the answer is not the same for everyone so use your head question anything, everything and then question your research until you find your best answer.

 This has gotten me into a ton of controversy in my life and I love it!

The name of the series, Family of Dog, is actually a lyric from a song noting DOG is GOD backwards.

•When you chose to write this book, did you base it off of any personal belief system, or was it based on what you knew of Christianity?

This is a very good question and also very important. I cannot tell you how important this piece of information is for anyone who reads The Family of Dog series.

These books are fiction. I do not claim or believe any of the events in the book actually happened and I have already been flooded with theological minded individuals about how the story is not factually sound nor is it plausible due to time lines. And the book is not even out; there are only pieces of the book available.

Now, having said that, let me outline my view on things. I am NOT a Satanist!

Though some might call me that, I abhor religion though I embrace faith.

I advocate questioning organized religion, but do it with education and meaning. Chaos without cause is empty.

Dying your hair green to look cool at school is one thing, but when it is against the rules it has an entirely different meaning. I am breaking the rules. I am the enemy of organization in the minds of people.

As far as my knowledge of Christianity, try me. I believe in the adage "Know thy enemy".

So in short, yes. And I am against any organized system of belief.

•Who is your favorite author, and did their writing style influence the way you wrote the book?

It’s hard to say. Ann Rice, maybe? Clive Barker’s “The Books of Blood” are monumental.

Stephen King; a lot of his work actually takes me home. I am from New Jersey and he is from Boston. I believe just the way he writes makes me feel like I am back east eating a Dolly Madison or a tasty cake on the beach; silly but it’s true.

As far as influence, I think I have come up with something never before done.

There really was nothing to draw influence from. It all came from a dream I had and it was like this seed that just grew and grew and turned into this massive story line. I can watch the entire movie in my head!

I will say that the original version of the book, the first draft, is much, much more shocking than the final product. I have a wonderful group of people around me softening my blows. My publicist is fantastic. She will just say "Jake......seriously" lol and I know every time she is right on the money.

My editor is fantastic and should get a co-author title but she does not want one

I call her up and say, “Listen I need a crown of thorns put on Ronald McDonald". Then I get 15 emails asking the history of McDonalds, where do large thorns grow, etc. She pushes me and then she takes my twisted work and makes it beautiful. It’s an art taking a bloody chunk of meat and turning it into a rose, but she does it.

 I am actually considering releasing the original unedited draft as a limited deal on Halloween. 666 copies only.

•What are the underlying themes of Family of Dog?  Are there any lessons that you are trying to teach in this book?

Yes and no. I am not a preacher or a teacher, I am just a normal guy with non-linear thinking who wants to share this story because I believe it is a brand new type of writing.

This is going to be the big shocker: This book is not about Satan or God in all actuality it is about the greed of mankind. Seriously, it is something we all can believe in today’s world. People are greedy and mankind’s greed has caused ALL of the world’s greatest atrocities. The Holocaust, 9/11, Jim Jones, Jeffery Dahmer, Charles Manson… I mean this could go on for days. Man is the problem, not Satan.

And that’s where the focal point of the book comes from. In the beginning you learn about the deal God and Satan have, the BIG secret. When the humans sue Satan all pacts are off. BUCKLE UP! It’s a roller coaster of insanity.

•Who is your favorite character in the Family of Dog book, and why?

Melatron, without a question!!! Melatron is an angel that was cast out of heaven with Lucifer. He then fought with Lucifer and pledged his soul back to God.

And since the voice of God will destroy humans (it’s in the bible!) God sends Melatron to speak for him at the trial and Satan punishes him. It’s amazing.

The description of Melatron and the way he communicates is just incredible. Every time I read it I kinda say to myself, "Dude that’s not bad!"

•The idea of people suing the devil because the outcome was less than what they wanted is the key plot in your story. This is an interesting story point that not many people really thought of before. How did you come up with this particular story angle?

It was a dream about a bunch of women, I such as Kim Kardashian or those despicable ladies on Jersey Shore or Kate Goslin who thinks she is special because she has 8 children. You know what’s special is a mother of 8 in the Bronx raising her children working 3 jobs that is special!! But we will never see THAT on television because reality is just too much for people to deal with, that is why they dive into crap like Jersey Shore… OK now I am ranting.

The dream had all of these ladies sitting on the hoods of their Ferraris in front of their mansions, showing off their 9 carrot diamond rings, wearing $4,000 dollar shoes and saying to each other, "This just is not enough".

That is how it all started...Who is the world’s biggest scapegoat?

Satan

•What sort of research did you do when writing your book?

Ah, well my editor and I did research on Finland. I chose Finland because Helsinki is actually designed and built according to the design of the seven layers of Hell in Dante's Inferno.

Also we had to research Finnish law and proceedings.

A little research on ritual magic, but overall not too much

And I learned how to live on 2 hours of sleep..... lol

•What were the biggest challenges that you faced when writing your story?

The biggest challenge was condensing the movie in my head into a book that was not ten thousand pages long. Originally the 18 people suing the devil were all going to be in the first book, but with a genius suggestion I decided to do

6 people in the first book (The Harvest) 6 people in the second book (Return to Sender) and 6 in the third book (The Reich).

So 666...... ohhhhh scary huh?

I also think that sex is an important element in my books, not so much in The Harvest but it picks up steam in the second book Return to Sender.

Sex is a driving force of not only evil, but in competition. Think of it like this, do you cook the same dinner for your brother as you do for the hot redhead you want to fill out like an application?

•What got you interested in writing about this type of genre, in particular, religion?

It touches a big nerve, religion, because it is what we have all been taught!

I just want someone to admit that if we all took our children only to McDonalds and if they ate anywhere else they would suffer an eternity of fire, McDonalds would be the size of the pentagon.

It’s indoctrination and it should be questioned. I don’t know about you, but I will take some sushi and lamb chops over a damn Big Mac any day any time!

Lastly, a few things my press agent gets all of the emails before I do and I LOVE that she is my right hand! But do not hesitate to contact me. I will answer all emails do every interview. Just ask my Facebook and Twitter friends, I will call you personally.

It is also important to say I am going to be giving a portion of the proceeds to Project Boobies (www.projectboobies.com). I want to give back everything I can.

Thanks for all of the fans over at The Family of Dog Blog  http://familyofdog.blogspot.com

Find me on twitter @jakebannerman and search Jake Bannerman on Facebook.

Once again, thanks! I hope everyone enjoys the book and if someone happens to want to be involved just shoot my press agent an email: e_prov@yahoo.com.

On the Non stop to Nowhere!
Jake B